53. I'm Ghosting You But I'm Still Here

[00:00:06] This is The Ghost Podcast, I'm your host Rosemary and today my guest is Emma. Welcome to the show Emma. Hi! Thank you for having me. Now Emma, let's jump in. I know you have a really interesting story to share.

[00:00:17] I think our listeners will really appreciate hearing about your experience. So why don't you start off by telling us about yourself? So I'm a French woman. I don't say French, Transwoman. I'm very proud of why I am.

[00:00:32] I'm, I'm, I think that in my story because at one point that's going to make that's going to be a big play. In my story with my ghost. So that's why you guys need to know. I'm a Transwoman and I am not shaming that.

[00:00:47] And you're currently in the US, right? Yes, I live in the US. It's been, I've been here for four years. Oh, I'm, I'm really glad to be here, action. So how did you meet your ghost? So I met my ghost on Tinder, which is not uncommon these days.

[00:01:08] And as, um, you know, I'm, like I told you I'm a very part of why I am. So on my profile, it's, it's on it. You know what you see is what you get. I'm a Transwoman.

[00:01:21] So if, if you want to deal with it, I'm here. If you don't want to deal with it, then swipe to the next one. We started talking actually we started talking in May last year.

[00:01:33] Just to be just to be clear with you. And we were supposed to go on a date. It never happened. Never happened disappear. We didn't talk anymore after that. In September last year, you can back again.

[00:01:50] And I told him, listen, if you come back again, this time it has to happen. And I just leave me alone. Please give me another chance. Everyone of me too, I think I was not ready before. Now I am.

[00:02:03] Okay, let's do it because I really like the energy we had to use. Were you still talking on Tinder or were you texting or were you outside the app at that point? No, after May I was at Sadie App and then I came back.

[00:02:17] And then I met him again. I met him again. I met him again. And then we did a Friday away because I'm a sugar. So I'm doing a lot of performances everywhere in Chicago. And on a Tuesday was the what are you doing tonight?

[00:02:34] I'm getting ready for work. I was working at the club. I was working at was closed where I was living. So it was like, I'm coming over. And normally, I'm not very much like a first date at my work because you,

[00:02:48] I'm different. I'm working and he just, he just started. He just started. I've been enjoying the show and he was like, you're looking at me like I was a princess. And I was like, okay, but you know, I was not like,

[00:03:01] you know, when you go on the first day to really into it, I was just like, we see what's going to happen. I don't want to think about it. That's a good role invasive to come to your work to me. She, I wouldn't like that. I don't know.

[00:03:14] Normally, I don't like that because the guys that knows I'm a sugar, they're always very curious. And I'm like, let's just wait. Let's just meet in a neutral place. Just try to know the real Emma and then you can see. Yeah, Terry, go.

[00:03:29] You know when I'm at work because that's different. But I just heard up. Okay, fine. Ian, enjoy the show instead after we talked. And I was with my friend. So in Jimt in right away, it was not just the both of us. It was with my friend.

[00:03:44] Just everybody liked him. He liked everyone. We went to another club after that. And then we went to one of my friends place. That breakfast was so so late. Man you had to work at 7 a.m. And then you grabbed my hand and he was like,

[00:04:03] I like you Emma. I really wanted to date you. I'm like, we have a few drinks. I mean, I think you're getting ahead of yourself because we all know as girls, we all know those guys. You know they get excited and then. So I'm not just just chill.

[00:04:18] No, I really want to date you. Okay, fine. I didn't think too much about it. And I'm like, now you need to go because you know, I want you to go at work. No, I'm just going to get inside. I want to stay with you.

[00:04:29] I'm like, I want to stay with you. I'm like, I want to stay with you. I want to stay with you. Okay. So this is Claire Mar, this first night we slept together. That's not something I do. This is not the next cues.

[00:04:43] We were a little bit drunk. Whatever. I didn't, I really didn't think much about anything. And then in my mind, I was like, okay, I'm never going to say him again. I'm like, I don't want to be pity for myself. But I'm a trans girls.

[00:04:59] It may be you wanted to try it. I'm the experience. So, okay, that that happened. Whatever, that's fine. It's Tinder. I don't like it, but this, that's my foot. And then he started texting me again during the week. I want to see you.

[00:05:15] I really want to see you again. No, then I was shocked. I was like, oh, I'm real. Yeah, I really like you. I really like what we had going on. I want to see you again. Then we went on a proper date.

[00:05:27] And it kept going, kept going, kept going. Until he told me that, listen, I think I want to make that exclusive. I want you to be of Tinder. I want to be of Tinder and I want to be your boyfriend. And I was like, so happy, you know.

[00:05:43] I was like, okay, let's do it. How long have you been dating at that point? A month. Okay. So, one of my friends that very, this is very fast. I'm like, you know, some men knows what they want right away.

[00:05:59] It's a man that's going to ask you to wait longer. And now when I told him, I was like, so I really sure you want to do it. He was like, yeah. And since the very first time I saw you, I knew what I wanted.

[00:06:11] And I said, what do you think about me being a trans woman? How do you feel about that? It's like, I don't think about you as a trans woman. You're my beautiful girlfriend. That's how I see. And he was ready to face all the consequences, you know?

[00:06:25] Because I was like, I don't know if you want to be a father, but that's something I can't give you. And what about the family if this situation goes further, like this relationship goes further and further. If I suppose to meet your family, are you comfortable with it?

[00:06:40] Is like my brother, my sister, my father is going to be going to be very open. And it just like me, you're going to be just fine. Okay, I trust you. I mean, you are going to be a man. I trust you. Okay, that's fine.

[00:06:52] And it was too early anyway. So two weeks after that, he told me that he loved me. I wasn't in the gym. I was like, wow, amazing. These guys love my friend. Everybody love him.

[00:07:05] He loved my job. He loves me. I'm like, I have a boyfriend. I'm so happy. Can I ask you, what was your relationship history before this? Have you had many long-term serious boyfriends? Yes. Yes. Yes. Actually, that is my short-term relationship. Actually. So I'm going to fast forward.

[00:07:27] We've been together for three months at that point. Everything is fine. And then comes Thanksgiving. Okay. Again, we were partying because it was Halloween. I wanted to be with my family and Thanksgiving. I was like, I really should. Because it's been only like a few months.

[00:07:54] Like, yeah, I want you to meet them. Okay. We don't part of the truth. Because it didn't know I'd do a project of family by saying, okay, my girlfriend is trans. But at that point everybody knows why I am.

[00:08:08] Everybody saw my pictures. Everybody thought I was gorgeous, beautiful, whatever. And I thought that I was just going to be a little bit more beautiful. But I think that's the truth behind it. Can I ask you, is it important to you that people know that?

[00:08:23] Or is that something that you don't feel you need to disclose? So when I go out when I meet people like Aquatmosis or whatever, I don't need to disclose because this is my life. This is my private life. It's like family, best friend and everything.

[00:08:40] I want them to know me for why I am. Because obviously you want to know where I come from. You want us to question. So I want them to know. It matters to me. It matters to me. And so fast forward Christmas arrive. We still together.

[00:08:59] And it's like so excited. And it was on the 23rd. We, I talked to my dad. You can come for Christmas. I'm not going to meet him. Talk to you that. Yeah, I told him that you were trans and that you're going to come to a family dinner.

[00:09:17] I'm like, is he okay with that? Yeah, it's fine. My brother loves you. They want to see you. So I was excited because in my mind, you should have given you a very more time to get to the idea.

[00:09:32] You know, of course, the 24th of the actor, the father calls him, ringing out. So what, what are he going on? So you know you can let any other woman, why are you coming out? The father is an undergeneration. So it was not very understanding about everything.

[00:09:52] So I that point my girlfriend, scaled, shandown. I was very hurt. I shut down to for two days, it was a mess within and talk. We were going to break. Then between Christmas and New Year's Eve, we come back to me, we talk, everything is fine.

[00:10:10] We're going to date. I'm not sure know this is our relationship. This is not your father's relationship. So we're going to deal with it later. It's you and me now. So did you meet the family or you didn't meet the family? Because it had was freaking out.

[00:10:25] I didn't meet the family. But they know about me, but I didn't meet the family. So after the 27, the last date we had was on a Thursday, Friday morning, it wakes up. So we were at my apartment.

[00:10:44] It wakes up in any two years because I don't feel good. But I was half asleep. I'm not okay sure. During that day, you know you can tell when someone's and when somebody texts you, you can tell the vibe in the text.

[00:10:58] You can tell like when you know the person you can feel something is going on. I could feel it. And I was like no that may be okay. I'm anxious. The next day I knew it already. The way you were texting me on Saturday, I was like,

[00:11:14] he's leaving me. So I called him and he was like, I don't want to talk to you now. Never happened in three months. Never. I'm not what's going on. I don't feel like I want to talk to you. I don't know, I'm just like,

[00:11:31] I don't know what I want. I don't I'm lost. I'm like oh my gosh, my gosh, what's going on? In my mind thinking about what happened with the family because he had a fight with his dad and me being trunks. I'm like okay this is getting too real.

[00:11:47] And of course the family is going to take over which is, yeah that's the family. No I'm just I'm just a girlfriend. I'm like okay this is the decision. And then drop the face of the earth. No news, not nothing. For like a week and a half.

[00:12:07] That's when I reach out to you the first time. So I was both so sad thinking. I don't deserve love. So that man was in love with me. Everything was fine until the family came in. And now I'm just by myself, just rejected.

[00:12:24] I was I had a breakdown. My body shut down. I had to be a refugee emergency because it wasn't big thing. So I faced everything alone. You know when you get ghosted, you think about what you could have done or said. And at that point, I'm like,

[00:12:42] maybe I did something wrong. So you analyze, you analyze and you review everything. And then I text him again, apologize for things I thought was my fault. And then now he reached out. He answered my text and he's like, Emma, I'm so sorry.

[00:13:00] I still I still love you. I still have feelings for you. I'm so sorry. I I I remember as I don't know. I don't know if I can come back from that. I know I I handle the Thanksgiving and Christmas situation. Very poorly.

[00:13:16] I heard I heard you and that's not something I wanted to do to somebody. I love and I'm like, if you still have feelings for me because I have. We can talk and make it better. Okay, I'm coming tomorrow. I want to talk to you.

[00:13:30] Never reply to the camera. Why's never shot? I said, Emma, text you were supposed to come. Let me own red. So at that point, I'm not very hurt in my mind. I blocked him of my social media because he was still watching my stories.

[00:13:47] I'm not you are ghosting me. You are not responding to me. You're supposed to come. You're not showing up. Why are you watching my story? So you can see what's going on in my life. I'm gonna I'm gonna block you. That's my thought. I blocked him.

[00:13:59] Can I ask? Can I ask what is his age range? To start it too. Okay. To start it too. I'm totally. You know when when when when when when when when when when when when when when when when you You see the heart you see beyond that.

[00:14:17] I'm falling through your podcasts because I was like so, so sad. I went on on my app and I was looking for podcasts. Go straight and then I found you. And I've been really sad to everything. Crying, crying, listening to that song and everything.

[00:14:36] I mean I was like, it made me feel good at the same time. But to be honest, I was not finding a way. I'm not finding my ghost in those stories. I'm not, it's not an assistist in the social past. Isn't I know that man loved me?

[00:14:53] You know when sometimes you, you don't see clearly when you're in love and your friends gonna tell you, you know Emma, I think that man is making fun of you. I mean, he's not a good guy for you. You don't see it, but everybody can see that.

[00:15:05] It was not like that. Everybody loved him and everybody was like Emma. That man, when he looks at you, you like a queen. And it was like that. His actions were really falling through the words. He was trying to do everything to be with me all the time.

[00:15:25] I didn't miss anything when I was with him. So I knew the love was real. So I was like, what happened? What was just living like this? Like alone rejected, not answering my take. I was crying over voice message never replied.

[00:15:44] And then at that point, I'm like, you know what? I don't want to be tempted. I'm just gonna love him and he raised a number. That's what I've done. And then, when we played, I received a text. That was just, all of what we might sleep.

[00:16:04] It was like midnight. And something, I was like falling asleep, working out, falling asleep. And I was very sad. Like I was depressed. And it was him. I recognized a number. Like, I love you and miss you so much. Can I see you?

[00:16:19] So I was like, it was Saturday night. I received a text that they have until the end. I woke up at like around midnight. I texted him again. Like, I mean, for sure if you want to talk, I don't have to worry. You can come over. Never reply.

[00:16:35] Never reply. So I'm like at that point, if you want to go see me, just go see me because it happened around one time last year. The guy goes me, but goes me like all the way through. It was done after that. It was done.

[00:16:51] No text, no message, nothing. But he was like, I'm going to see you. But I'm around. I'm going to see you. But I'm still here. I love you and I miss you. So I was so hurt at that point when I received that text.

[00:17:06] I was like, even if it doesn't reach out. I'm happy because I'm still here in his mind. You know? So I know there's something deeper to that. Okay. Did I reply? I'm fine. But I knew what was going on. I'm going to cut to that.

[00:17:25] Yesterday, I sent him a text. So I'm telling you yesterday, like really yesterday. Because he lost his mom ten years ago from cancer. And she died in January. So I sent him a text just like being like nice.

[00:17:44] You know, like I know this is a part time because you lost your mom. I just wanted to show you that I was presented and I think about you like positive vibes. Like very sweet, like very neutral. In my mind is not going to answer whatever.

[00:17:57] And then that that that that big discussion. It was with his brother. He was like, I mean my brother, I'm watching a show. I'm like, okay fine. Enjoy your evening. The show is over texting me again. Like texting me until one.

[00:18:14] And then sending all the pictures that we took. Like I miss us. I miss you so much. I want to hug you. I love you. I'm like. So you still have feelings for me? Like of course my feelings come disappear like that in in in three weeks.

[00:18:28] I still have feelings for you. And I'm so sorry. I put you through that. And then the last thing he said was, I can sneak out from my brother's place and come to you now. I'm not okay fine. And he came yesterday.

[00:18:45] He was like, I just want to see, I don't want to talk. I want to sleep next to you. I want to hold you. That's what happened. But then he said, oh, Then we started talking a little bit.

[00:18:58] And he told me the reason why he goes to me. Which I was a way to find. But I knew something was that. I'm not okay. So tell me, your dad couldn't take the fight that I'm different. You got scared, you got real. So disappear. Never.

[00:19:23] That has nothing to do with you. Nothing to do with you being true. Not in the world, your trans identity has something to do with what happened. I have a problem. And what do you mean? I'm an alcoholic. I've been drinking for two years. And I'm depressed.

[00:19:43] And I was drinking behind your back. And I'm not so, I never saw you sober. Yeah, you saw me sober. But sometimes I need to drink and have one or two drinks to do this. And it brought my heart. And then he gives me like example.

[00:19:59] Like you remember when I was at your place with Digno, your four-nature's. And you were in Orlando working. I'm not here. It was like I was a hammer on yourself. I was already drunk. You remember when we went to this concert. And I went to the bathroom twice.

[00:20:14] I got shots of whiskey. And I was like I remember that because at that point he was like, I could tell that he was changing. And you know when you have a boyfriend, you know the mother. So you try to respect them the best way you can.

[00:20:29] So when you see something going on, you ask question. But when the person is telling you, no I'm fine. So you try to understand you're like okay, fine. You let me know. And I'm not gonna push it.

[00:20:41] But I always knew that my ghost was somebody sad and depressed. I could tell in his eyes. I could tell the way he was. He was, I don't know the way he was living his life. I could tell something was really broken here.

[00:20:58] And the way he was sleeping or so. Talking in his sleep a lot of sweat, falling asleep like everywhere he goes. The joe and gring, I was like, are you saying grinching? All of that it signs of people that are depressed.

[00:21:15] And I tried to tell him about it and he always denied it. And he was like, I don't like when you try to read me. And I'm not because I love you. Me and I feel like there was a sad night.

[00:21:25] He knew that I don't know where it came from. And he never could express in a sad, like a normal person. Everything is so deep, but on the inside. And in my sense. And he's like, you know, it was always like that. With my brother, with my father.

[00:21:44] And I know that the man passing away from cancer. That really broke him, broke him. So yeah, I understand when you put that together to drinking the sadness. Yeah, it makes sense. So what happened on Christmas is said that was too much. I started drinking.

[00:22:01] I saw your text, but I was upset. I couldn't reply and then I fell on barrised. And then he's a circle. But deep down when he was drinking, you know when they say when you drink, you have the, you really speak from the heart.

[00:22:16] That's why I was receiving those texts. I love you. I miss you and then nothing anymore. I miss you. I want to see you sending me pictures. And because he had to crush a doctor.

[00:22:25] And he said, he said, Emma, so many times I was in front of your apartment. Trying to go in, but I was ashamed. I was embarrassed. So I feel sad. I don't hate him. I'm not mad at him. I just feel sad.

[00:22:48] Because I try to give my hand and never talk it. Because the shame, he said, I even don't know if I, It's not fair to you. I need to get sober. But I think I need to do that on my own. And then do you have a plan?

[00:23:05] What are you going to do? Because it doesn't want to see a therapist. We talked about all those things. I'm like, you're going to need to go to meetings. You're going to have to get a doctor following. You're going to let by yourself.

[00:23:16] So at that point, I don't know what I don't know what to do. I just morning when he left. I sent him a huge text supporting text, you know? And it didn't reply.

[00:23:30] And I'm even not sure if it's going to come Friday because it's a Friday we're going to talk. I'm even not sure if it's going to show. It's like this on and off ghosting. I think you probably already know this.

[00:23:45] I'm sorry that you went through that experience the first time he goes to do it with so bad. You had a physical breakdown, but I think this just goes to show every time that it's never anything you did that caused a ghosting for anybody.

[00:23:59] Not just you, but, you know, now you know that right? And what's so cool about ghosting is a lot of people who get ghosts for the first time. Now I'm an experienced ghost. I've been ghosting so many times.

[00:24:11] I was about not about me, but you know the first time it is something you take so personally. And it's so cool because always the other person, something with them, whether they're hiding a secret or they're in our

[00:24:24] Sussis where they're just really, really immature, which is what going to be my guess before you told me that actually because he is an alcoholic. But it, I mean, it makes sense. It's all kind of ties together.

[00:24:35] It is immaturity is tied up with his shame with his alcoholism, with his addiction. And it is something that you have no control over, right?

[00:24:44] You know, and it is a tough decision for you at this point if you want to be with someone knowing that you're probably going to see this behavior over and over and over again. You know, my, my mom, she's my best friend. She's everything to me.

[00:24:58] So I talked a lot with my mom and you know sometimes the emotions get the best of you and you don't think about it. You don't think rationally. And when you come down, you think that you think better, you know.

[00:25:10] And so I was saying my mom, I'm like, why? Because it wasn't love with me. What, what, and then it's detailed is enough. So why all of this?

[00:25:20] And she told me, Emma, that doesn't mean that because it's not answering that when you see it, it's your text, that is not crying either. That is not sad.

[00:25:30] Everybody process emotions different. I'm someone, I'm going to be we need to talk and then I'm going to open my heart and cry and cry on you.

[00:25:39] And you can be like, no, I'm going to need like one two weeks before I can talk to you because I need to process everybody's different. But you know, when you get go straight to me, you always take your insecurity.

[00:25:53] And mine, security sometimes is maybe different because it's I know it's. I know that for some for some guys, it can be it can be tough. You don't need to love me, you know.

[00:26:08] And when the family gets into it, I'm like, okay, there is a guilt trip. There is the shame on my son is gay all these all that and I'm not okay.

[00:26:18] That that's it. It goes to me because of that it was like I don't want to hurt her because I know I know how she feels about herself. So I'm just going to disappear and it was something completely different totally different nothing to do with that.

[00:26:34] Do you think his family knows about his addiction? So it told me yesterday that it runs in the family and I know that the brother because yesterday they were drunk together and the father, yeah, they drink a lot.

[00:26:49] They really drink a lot. And it told me nobody knows I didn't talk to anyone. So in my mind, I'm like, you didn't talk to anyone. So how are you going to do this? That by yourself?

[00:27:01] With your willpower, you're going to need to go to someone, profession and he's like, but I want to be able to go out and have a drink with my girlfriend and I know you're going to have to be sober.

[00:27:14] It's a door that you're going to have to close and that's going to be like this. So many people leave their life sober and everything is fine.

[00:27:23] So sometimes I feel like it doesn't realize but yesterday once again you was drunk when you came to me, giving him the courage to talk, you know. And it feels sad because it's like, no, when you told me that I was like, me coach.

[00:27:41] So I was with him and he was always like, I don't know like he was never sober. Yeah, you saw me sober and like, but when when you wake up in the morning and sometimes he was coming over and I could say I could smell it.

[00:27:55] And I did and there to say this because I was I want to put him in a, you know, like in a shamp place because he's a grown man.

[00:28:03] And when they are, I was like, have you been drinking because I feel like a smandy alcohol? No, it's not that's not like that.

[00:28:11] I'm okay. I'm just going to say anything but deep down you know deep down you know you know you know you're part of it, you know you can see through it. So people don't tell me, but don't I could see it.

[00:28:27] I knew he was depressed and you know it. There's also a reminds me of something else I hear a lot on this podcast is that three month time period, which is sounds like you are kind of in is when things.

[00:28:38] You're kind of fall apart a lot of times or you really get to know the person at a different level at that three month mark. They can change the relationship and it sounds like that's also part of what came into play.

[00:28:50] Yeah, yeah that's true because it was three months and the funny part is that everything happened at the end of the year. And of the year beginning of the year.

[00:29:01] So here we are it's like my ghost is a ghost but now the ghost is a part time ghost. I don't know it sounds funny but it's not. And so I don't know what to do.

[00:29:13] Some people would tell me like, just leave. It's not your problem anymore but I feel like, I don't know. I want to be there if you want my head but I want to be there. To him because I told him as a girlfriend and also your friend.

[00:29:30] So I want to be there. I just want to be like okay, you know what is this too much? I'm running away, you know. Like we are talking about alcoholism and depression. I mean that's stuff. Once you did with that after being ghosted.

[00:29:45] Yeah and that is going to be his reaction until he does do the work to change it. He is going to continue to ghost you as that shame kicks in as that avoidance kicks in.

[00:29:57] And that's something you're going to have to figure out if you want your life or not. Even as a friend, right? He's probably going to be the same thing. I know and I feel like it's like that because when he was with me everything was fine.

[00:30:12] When we love until that stuff happened the ghosting happened and then the shame and everything. When he came yesterday, he was like feeling it because of the alcohol. So he was like really talking but then he's morning the shame came back and he never replied to my text.

[00:30:28] And I'm like okay is he really going to come on on Friday to talk? Like when he says sober, oh, is he going to drop again and come back in three months or two weeks? I don't know.

[00:30:42] Well, I must be at least some consolation to you to know the reason. A lot of people never get that closure. Yeah, yeah it's it feels good. It's not a great reason but it feels good because sometimes it's nothing to do with you.

[00:30:59] Nothing to do with what you think it could be. I was not expecting that really not. But I feel sad for him. You know, I feel bad and you know what makes it hard is because it's not like okay. I go stupid.

[00:31:16] You know, I think we better off. I don't really love you anymore. I want to move on. No, the guy came back to me. Love me and he missed me and so it's at that point in second man game.

[00:31:29] I was like, go to me and just drop in this up here and I can move on. But no, it's still here. He wasn't my bad yesterday like hugging me. Like before the break up, I mean the break up before the ghosting.

[00:31:45] Because we never said anything like we were breaking up. When I was ghosted, I said many texts like tell me you don't want me anymore. Just tell it. Break the chain so I can move on. Just tell me it's over. You never said it. Never.

[00:32:02] And I gave him the chance just just break me for break me free. He never said it. Because he didn't want to, but he is also to reply to you at the same time. So I know it's really fresh for you that's all just happened.

[00:32:17] But what do you think you're going to do going forward? You just need some time to process. I don't know. It's like when I love someone, it can be friends family or lover. I'm always giving a lot. I always give a lot and I don't know.

[00:32:34] I feel like this man is helping. And now the time of the situation. Of course I can push him. I can only show him the time here that I can help. If he wants my help, I'm going to be there if he doesn't want me.

[00:32:48] I mean, you know you can only do so much. But it's yeah, I feel sad. I'm not going to lie. I feel sad because it's deeper than that. I feel like it's beyond us. I don't know. Because I still have feelings for him.

[00:33:13] And because I know he still have feelings for me, it's hard to move on. Well, I'm a maybe you can stay in touch and maybe we can do a follow-up episode down the road. If you feel up to it and let us know how this situation turns out.

[00:33:29] I mean for sure, yeah. Yeah, that this is a definitely a stage-on situation. Because my ghost is a ghost who's not being a ghost. Is there any advice or things that you feel you've learned that you want to share with the listeners before we wrap up?

[00:33:47] Maybe I don't know maybe if you feel like when you have a partner and if you feel like your partner really needs your help. You try to give your help and your partner refuse it. Just push, just push, I think I should have pushed harder. Yeah.

[00:34:05] I should have pushed harder and push him out of his comfort zone, pushing beyond guilt and unbearable embarrassment. Because at the end of the day that's the person you share your life with. You share the love. So you're supposed to be helping each other, you know?

[00:34:21] Especially when you see it. Because I could see everything, but he was the 9-it. I should have pushed harder. Because sooner or later that's going to come out and see the family had to be involved in everything that's coming out. Everything came out.

[00:34:39] Am I know this was a difficult story to tell? I know it's really fresh for you and ongoing. So thank you so much for coming on the podcast and talking about this today. Thank you for giving me the chance to...

[00:34:53] Clean my heart because it feels good to be able to share my story. I like what you said that your ghosting story is different than what we've had on the podcast before.

[00:35:03] So, you know, I hope that if someone does hear this episode and they've been in a similar situation, it'll help them through that situation as well. And just I think reiterating the idea and that you never know what's causing this and it's not you almost all the time.

[00:35:20] I think that. No, no. Sometimes you have to feel bad for your ghost because you know that what they feel inside is so strong that they even come talk about. They even go and face you. Can you imagine?

[00:35:33] Because you go to the struggle of being ghosted but they go to a different struggle as well. And I'm not talking about sociopath or narcissistic something about real person, real people. People that really love you really gave you everything.

[00:35:47] Listeners, if you have a ghost to share, if you have feedback on this episode or you want to just reach out, you can find me on thegozpodcast.com.

[00:35:54] You can send an email to the ghost podcast stories at gmail.com and you can also find me on Instagram and TikTok at the ghost podcast stories. And as always, thank you for listening.